hand. forehead. staple.

I’m working the membership booth at the zoo today. They’re playing Christmas music out front.
THEY ONLY HAVE FIVE SONGS.
I’ve been here for 4 hours already. I have one more hour, then a break, then 4 more.
Please shoot me. I can only take so much Christmas Cheer. I will not survive December.

cuz it looks like guts!

Last night in a dream I realized that if you mixed spaghetti and tomato juice and vodka, you’d have a hari kari bloody mary.
There was also a martini involving cigarettes, but it wasn’t as appetizing.

gojira xxx!!

Wow. I’d hate to have the last name Kuntilla.
All I can imagine is a giant twat attacking Japan.
Hell, they’d probably like it.
I wonder if it’d have feet, or just kind of squirm around. Flop on top of buildings, start doing kegels…
Probably leave a trail of slime like a snail.
Okay! Back to work!

uphill battles

There’s this delightful farmer’s market near here on Saturdays. I try to remember every week so I can brunch on free samples of fruit. Today I had a goat cheese tamale, which is quickly becoming my favorite farmer’s market food.
Last night I saw Steve Lucky and the Rhumba Bums with Miss Carmen Getit. So good. [...]

pune

Doing data entry at work and saw a membership form for a woman named Midori. Suddenly wished I could come across this person with a frown on her face and say “What’s wrong, Midori? Feeling sour?”
Hahaha.
Ha.

yes

I’ll admit it. I’m shallow. I have low self-esteem. I rely too heavily on the opinions of others. I have a poor body-image. I’m depressed. I’m overly stressed. I let myself get upset too easily over little things. I like getting attention. I like to complain. I enjoy hating myself.
So, there it is. Just keep [...]

hot sluts!

Was listening to the radio today; was told that the new standards for men and woman are the metrosexual and hot slut, respectively.
Now, I’m all for the metrosexual. I know a few myself. But the hot slut? We should all be Paris Hilton? There’s something to be said about more sexually aggressive women, but women [...]

6.13 pm

When I was in school there was nothing I wanted more than a place to settle down and stay for a while. Of course the second I sign a lease I feel tied down. And now I’m in a half-furnished apartment, a ready-to-bake dinner in the oven, and Joe mysteriously not home, having gotten off [...]

quick and dirty

One of the things I like about dooce.com is the sidebar updates. I’m also fond of Leslie Harpold’s daily status section. I’m considering doing something like that here, but it would require work which is simply out of the question.
But a lot of times I have a thought or an experience that doesn’t warrant its [...]

the entry what i wrote

Blah blah, Halloween, blah blah, November, blah blah, cold weather, blah blah blah homesick for places that aren’t home, blah bored blah underdeveloped blah wasted poetential blah blah blah.